and then, depression set in

Listen--as much as I am capable of deluding myself for decades, there comes a time when stark reality slaps me across the face and I have to admit that it's just not working.

This is one of those times.

In conversation earlier with the lady who has generously donated space to both Autogenic Alchemy and Lady Disdain, we decided jointly that her continuing to fund at least the Lady Disdain part of the equation was madness--I haven't sold one thing, not one thing in six months. And before that? I sold two dollarbie mirrors. And that was it for the last six months before that.

(I don't count the charity efforts; they do sell, but as they don't make anything I can donate towards rent...)

So today, I've taken down everything I had for sale in the store, the store itself, and killed Lady Disdain Creations, the store group. There is more than a touch of sadness to this, but let's be honest--I wasn't putting out new things even on a monthly basis, and my heart really hasn't been in it for the last year.

So...end of store project. I fail as a merchant.

I will be putting up one or two items on the Marketplace, but I don't expect sales there either. That's just the last sputtering stubborn intent of my merchanting ability, which, as I have regretted learning, is pretty much nil.

It's been...I won't say fun, but it's been something. And now, it's all over but the actual funeral.

Y'all excuse me, I'm going to go kill things on City of Heroes for a while, where I at least feel somewhat less ineffectual.

the new store is out!

I know. It's shocking. Especially shocking considering I was going to take June and do this big promo, and make lots of new stock, and restart my business with a big bang...

...Yeah. That didn't so much happen.

However, today, things happened! For one, I put the custom store down:

(from the Lady Disdain album)

This is just the outside, and it's also the build I contracted out to the designer behind De Baza (that's the SL Marketplace link, not the in-world-store link, but that will still give you Sphynx Soleil's name, and how to get in touch with De Baza in world). It's an odd store, but I want to be clear that that is not Sphynx's fault; Sphynx does lovely, affordable, spacious builds targeted to specific needs (and did I mention the custom work?). Me, I wanted something specific, but tailored to my...um. Design ethos?

Which this build is. (MUAHAHAHAHA...err.) I mean, I got exactly what I wanted. I love this thing.

Unfortunately, because I've been so busy, I've only had time to do a couple quick new products:

(from the Lady Disdain album)

Because they're pretty quick makes, both of them, and also, because they're both targeted for specific communities, I'm only asking a Linden each for them. On the right is the Caledon Sun wall mirror, and on the left is the Winterfell Star wall mirror.

Both examples are full-bright, to see them easier; the sold versions are not, but can be easily made to be full-bright, if that's what you want.

The rest of the store is, yes, still empty, but I have big plans!

Or, well, at least plans. Which is better than I had before!

Happy July, everybody!

well, hell

Here we go again.

Back in September, I managed--somehow--to injure my knee really, really badly. Having no access to health care--and being too stubborn to go to the ER and incur tons of debt--I stayed home and rested, as much as I could.

This meant three things: lots of bitching about the leg (obviously); lots of bitching about resting (obviously); and lots of staying off my main computer (so I missed all but one hunt I'd been committed to be in, and totally ended up spinning out on the second annual Wear Grey charity event, which really hurt).

Fast forward to now. I--again, somehow--did it again. The lesson from all of this? For the love of all gods, don't swivel your body if you're not in peak condition. Because the two times I've swiveled and not actually just turned in another direction? I end up getting freakish sports injuries. The hell. Seriously, the hell.

So, back on the netbook. And again, the timing is direly ironic: because after the first of the year, I wanted to tear down the big tree and get back to the natural world: which for me, means mushrooms. Decor, seating, large, small, I'm going to be investigating the concept--when, that is, I can stay on the main keys long enough to do some graphics work and some building.

Feel free in the meantime to check out the main store while it's still up; furniture items, I think I'm going to be moving back to a skybox, and there's going to be no real order at first. But I'm going to do my best to keep the lower parcel just fungus, and whatever else strikes my fancy.

Hopefully, this injury will heal faster!

the slow, steady, infinitesimal sense...of progress

SO...I was slated to be in two hunts and another charity event. One of the hunts booked up the day I applied, so that was that (and likely a good thing, considering). But I'm still in the Unknown Hunt and the Wear Gray for a Day charity event.

The Unknown Hunt I am telling myself is not a large worry; they don't officially start for hunting until October, so I have time. Wear Gray, on the other hand, starts September 12th, which is--now--eight days hence.

I'm worried because first, my hard drive died, and it took too months to get a new drive. Now, I had been working on designs, but three days before we procured a new drive, something ate itself on my machine--I lost access to EVERYTHING I'd stored on the desktop, but also on internal folders. The only folder that remained clear was something I'd extended off from C: and...frankly, that was a lot of work lost.

We installed the new drive, I started transferring files over (both that I'd burned off from that one available folder, and files saved from before the first drive died), and then two days ago, I injured my leg (SOMEhow), and was stuck away from the comp, elevating the leg, applying ice to lower the swelling.

Now, I have a netbook, and it is a peachy-keen netbook, and I love it and I cuddle it and it is wonderful--for what it is. It will run Second Life, it won't do major graphics. And up until recently, photography was laughable.

So...I'm stuck. I've contacted one of the organizers behind Wear Gray with questions, but I'm not hearing anything back. I will likely send another notecard, along with an IM, in a couple days. But in the meantime, I'm having to face it--if I can't use the main keys, I can't finish the projects I'm planning for the events.

The Unknown Hunt has more lead time. I think my leg will feel better in a few weeks, no problem, and I'll be able to get back to pixilating bandages on dead skin. But Wear Gray? I just don't have it done. I was at the point where I had mocked-out patterns, and started to do template work without aging--but all I've really gotten accomplished? A half-aged pair of gloves.

Yeah. Really.

So yes, I'm worried. If I don't get the mummy skins done, hey, I'll do them for the store. Not a problem. I'm working on two store texture sets, and one--or the other--would also work as a gift. SOMEthing will be done in time for Unknown.

But the 12th...that's very nearly just a week from now. A week from now will I be able to sit at my desk without elevating the leg? I just don't know.

I'll keep you posted.

On the plus side--and this is good news--I finally have everything fixed and running in the main store lobby. By that, I mean, I have:

• the Virtual Haiti relief kiosk for donations
• the Thrifty Goth group join board
• the Unknown hunt board
• a Midnight Mania board up and running (with one of the Darkest Carni outfits in it, bloodspattered stripes, pretty sure it's still the only way to get that particular dress for the moment)
• the Wear Gray donation jar
• the Lady Disdain subscribe-o-matic board
• the notecard-giving logo board
• and two vendors for two different vodoun veves sets, both sending all proceeds to Haitian earthquake relief

Not bad. Next up: getting non-charity products up for sale!

[Also, yes, I am amused at my brain. I can just barely manage to vaguely hint at something going wrong on the main blog, but here and on Twitter? I can give all the RL details I think are meaningful and relevant.

[My brain is weird. But then, this is nothing new for anyone who knows me.]